Father’s Day is coming up this weekend.
Mother’s Day was in the month of May.
Do you appreciate your parents?
It was 46 years ago that I lost my father to a brain aneurysm and stroke. I was “Daddy’s little girl” and when he left us behind and headed into “Heaven”, I was devastated. For many years I was simply in denial about his death. I was also in denial about how flawed he was. He could have given Don Draper of “Mad Men” a run for his money. If you haven’t seen the AMC hit TV drama,” Mad Men”, go see it—it’s really a great show. “Mad Men” takes place during the era I grew up in and so its drama is very much as I remember those years (1960’s).
But this blog isn’t about “Mad Men”; it’s about my father – James Blake Cahoon. (Yes, I got my name from him.) I still miss him, even though I talk to him still, every once in a while. He’s unable to provide me with any deep dialogue anymore and because he left so early in my life, I really never got to know him as a human being. I did get to know my mother (who also has passed at the age of 83 in 2002. As a result of getting to know the person of Janet Cahoon, as opposed to my “Mother”, I manage to heal old wounds and forgive her for foibles in her raising me. She actually did a great job as a single widowed mother with two young daughters. Daddy (he’ll always be Daddy to me) was fifty years old when he passed in 1968. Back then that age was considered ‘older’ than it is now. Today 50 still a fairly young age, but back in the late ’60 it wasn’t totally unexpected to pass in your fifties. Today modern medicine could have saved him; back then not so much so.
As I stated, Daddy was flawed; he wasn’t perfect. Most people are in some fashion or another, but often we hold our parents up to a higher standard. As I child and even as a teen when he passed, I had put my father on pedestal. He did love me deeply, this I do know for sure.
He taught me the wonders of nature, he taught me about creativity and imagination. He was a film producer, director and writer. He was wood worker and carver, creating our coffee tables, a dining room table which we used for years and is now my sister’s desk, as well as carved gun handles and created Calder-style mobiles. He also refurnished various furniture pieces that are now in my home and my sister’s home. He had an entrepreneurial spirit that we both inherited.
He always told me that I was beautiful and talented. He provided me with a great deal of my self-worth. He was intelligent and intellectual. He read to me, providing me with a love of Winnie the Pooh and of books and reading. He played us classical and jazz music as well as the Beatles music.
I love movies and TV because of “Daddy”. I love walking in the woods, I love reading and exploring and traveling – all because of my father. Do we really appreciate our parents when we’re young? I doubt if he had lived I would be the person that I am. While I would like to have found out if this was so, I realize that I am who I am regardless if he had lived longer or not. I do appreciate both of my parents today. Both weren’t perfect; my father fell off his pedestal when I was in my 40s’.
This week in honor of Father’s Day, I pay tribute to one of the most important men in my life: my father – who passed on May 28, 1968. It was a year like no other –around the nation and especially for me. Like I said, I still miss you Daddy. Appreciate your parents. They try as hard as they know how to. Flaws and all. You never know when they won’t be around anymore.
What traits did you receive from your parents that you can appreciate? How much self-worth did you receive or not receive from your parents? Do you still blame your parents for your life or have you forgiven them? Have you forgiven yourself for feeling that way about them? It is OK to do so.
Examine your life and see how it is shaped because of the way you feel (still) about your parents. Share your comments with us—we can all learn from other’s example and situations.
Until next time,
Love and Light always,
Blake Cahoon, Spiritual Channel/Writer/Teacher
Illuminated Engagements Centre for Whole-Being
Blake recognizes that people, even parents aren’t perfect. Yet knows we can love them all the same. For once we embrace love, we move into divine guidance even more profoundly.
Don’t forget – Father’s Day is coming up! Shop for spiritual books, DVDs and meditative music at the Illuminated Engagements’ Amazon store!